Amateur Transplants

Who is to blame, the anesthesiologist or the surgeon?

You can’t spell “philodendron” without a PhD.

Getting into Grad School provides some useful tips on how to prepare/get into graduate school. It also has a student forum, guides, and links. But what I found most useful was their humor section.  

Some lines from “101 Things (NOT) To Do At Your Thesis Defense”:

• “Ladies and Gentlemen, as I dim the lights, please hold hands and concentrate so that we may channel the spirit of Herodotus…”
• Release a flock of doves.
• Group prayer.
• “There will be a short quiz after my presentation…”
• Make each professor remove an item of clothing for each question he asks.
• Mime.
• “In protest of our government’s systematic and brutal oppression of minorities…”
• “Anybody else as drunk as I am?”
• “I’m sorry Professor Smith, I didn’t say ‘SIMON SAYS any questions?’. You’re out.”
• Smoke machines, dramatic lighting, pyrotechnics…
• Use a Greek Chorus to highlight important points.
•  Leave Jehovah’s Witness pamphlets scattered about.
• “Duck, duck, duck, duck… GOOSE!”
• “Ladies and Gentlemen, please rise for the singing of our National Anthem…”
• Stage your own death/suicide.
• “The responsorial psalm can be found on page 124 of the thesis…”
• “Please phrase your question in the form of an answer…”